Tag Archives: Internet

Wednesday: Where’s My Internets?

5 Jan

This morning didn’t begin well. The internet was down. (Blood curdling scream!)

I know life is making me more impatient than I reasonably should be. It began with microwave ovens. Why wait?–nuke that food and eat NOW.

When I first had a computer in my house, I had AOL dial-up as my internet carrier. Has anyone else had the pleasure? It is truly “two Dixie cups and a string” territory. I remember an episode of Futurama in which Prof. Farnsworth announces, “Good news everyone! Last year I logged into America Online and I just got in!” I may be paraphrasing but that is the spirit of the joke.

Like a lot of jokes, that one was funny because it’s true.

Since I’ve had alleged “high speed” internet, the idea of waiting for dial-up is beyond the pale. But even the best internet providers can be slow (as all of you well know, I am sure) and when the internet is slow, I lose my patience rather rapidly. It is sort of like when the electricity goes off. My brain begins at once to seek alternative forms of energy or means of circumventing the current situation. I can’t stop flipping light switches when the power is out and I keep trying to make the internet work, even when the lights on my Clear modem are flashing like a sign in Vegas. Of course when the power is out I don’t have internet either–even though I immediately reach for the lap top, knowing it will operate in the dark. It will, but without sweet, sweet electricity, there is no internet. Unless I can pick up a wifi signal…

Last week I was at Starbucks where I ran into an old friend. While we were talking, a reporter from a local TV station approached us and asked if would be willing to appear on the air to discuss the impact of technology on the way we communicate (or fail to communicate) with each other. According to this reporter, USA Today has named 2010 the year we stopped talking to each other. Apparently we’re all about texting, email and instant messaging, cell phones in a pinch but not actual face to face conversation.

My friend and I were not willing to go on TV, but it is still an interesting topic. I know people who tell me when they have teenagers in their house, the kids will sit on the couch in close proximity and send text messages to each other. I can’t even catalog how many times I have seen someone’s decision to use email as a means of communication in a work setting cause all sorts of trouble, when a quick face to face chat would have been far more productive.

None of which has anything to do with the near mental breakdown that occurs when the internet refuses to do my bidding. “Aw, c’mon! I have to BLOG!” How can the internet provider (or the universe for that matter) be indifferent to that?

I survived my first day back at work. There had been no significant changes. No one sublet my office.  My inbox was fat and happy.

I hope your internet provider is good to you today. May your lunch microwave quickly and efficiently.

Happy Wednesday

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