Tag Archives: Happy Hour

This is my brain on….What?

15 Nov

It has been awhile since I blogged. So I thought I’d throw down a Happy Hour blog.

I am still not drinking, which is a good thing because lately I have become convinced that I do not have even one brain cell to spare. You’ve heard of dragging ass? Well, I have been dragging brain. I am even more disorganized than usual. My mind is all disheveled. I am a mess.

I will not recite a full catalog of my recent moments of mental malfunction, but just to share a few examples: I let my auto insurance lapse
because I just plain forgot to pay it. Fortunately, the insurance company was kind enough to notify the state of Florida who, in turn, was kind
enough to send me a little letter explaining how they were going to go ahead and suspend my driver’s license if I didn’t get myself some
insurance real soon.

Who says the folks at the DMV aren’t helpful and attentive?  Fortunately, I did get that all straightened out.

In other brain-failure news, I am still looking for a CD I checked out of the library before I went to Paris (in June!) and I pretty much
completely misplaced the month of October.

Gay Pride was in October. I was planning to go the very next Sunday when Gay Pride was happening. Imagine my surprise when I looked at the calendar, put 2 and 2 together and realized, the Sunday looming before me was in November. “November,” said I. “Why is it November? I haven’t finished with October yet!”

Well, October was finished with me.

So now it is the beginning of November, but it isn’t because Thanksgiving is next week.

It is a miracle I remembered to vote. That only happened because Florida has early voting and I happened to be in the neighborhood of the
Supervisor of Elections office downtown and saw people standing in line. “Oh, yeah–voting. Let me do that right now!” And so I did.

If I had put off voting until the actual first Tuesday in November, I would no doubt have wandered into the local community center where I am
registered to vote on the day I believed to be election day and found myself crashing some Christmas party for under-privileged kids or
something. “Where are the poll workers?” I might have asked. “You mean the North Pole workers?” the Rent-a-Santa might have replied, Why, my elves are in their workshop making toys for all the good little girls and boys!”

It isn’t 2013 yet, is it?

Actually I know what day it is (give or take 24 to 72 hours) because I keep showing up for work on the appropriate days at the appropriate times. God only knows what I am actually doing when I am at work, but hey, showing up is half the battle,

Also, I have committed to be in a play on November 30th. So far, I haven’t missed a rehearsal, so maybe I am doing better with the whole time thing. I am in a production of 8, which is a dramatization of the court case against Proposition 8 in California that banned same sex marriage. There is a great video of the Hollywood production available on You Tube. The cast is amazing—Martin Sheen, George Clooney, Brad Pitt, Jamie Lee Curtis, Christine Lahti, George Takai, Jane Lynch and others. I am playing the role played by John C. Reilly. It is really a fun part. Our cast is not quite as famous as the Hollywood cast, but they are all amazing, as is our director. I feel very fortunate to be a part of yet another exciting theater project,

Fortunately, the show is done as a reading–meaning the actors have a script in hand. I believe folks in the biz call that “on book.” It is a damn good thing I am playing this role “on book” considering my recent mental lapses. No telling what might come out of my mouth on stage otherwise.

A blog or two ago, I was celebrating the fact that I have just begun my 55th revolution around the sun. Turning 54 didn’t bother me. Really, I don’t feel old at all, Despite the apparent senility, But really, I don’t think I am senile. I just think my brain is just so full after so many years, I can’t quite work my way through the clutter.

That’s what I tell myself anyway,

P.S. If you are reading this blog, then I must have remembered my WordPress password, I will take that as a good sign!

Happy whatever day this is!

 

 

 

Happy Hour Blog, seltzer edition

2 Oct

 

Sometimes, fueled by coffee, I write blogs in the morning by following my stream of consciousness. I call those blogs Morning Pages–with a tip of the hat, as well as an apology to Julia Cameron.

Sometimes I write blogs after work. Still following my stream of consciousness. Until recently, I was also unwinding with an adult beverage as a wrote.

Nothing like a martini or bourbon to get your stream of consciousness a’flowing. Not so good for your typing skills, which is why Hemingway advised writing when drunk, but always edit when sober.

Well, this is a Happy Hour blog without the alcohol.

Yes–I have made the decision to quit drinking. So, this happy hour is fueled by Publix Lemon Lime seltzer, served chilled in a wine glass.

Cheers.

Not too long before I left for Paris, a voice in my head said, “when you get back from France, your next big adventure will be to stop drinking.”

Sometimes I have monkey mind chatter in my head; sometimes I have negative self-talk, sometimes I have old songs stuck in there–like “Brandy”, which I unfortunately heard at the grocery store on Saturday and have been toting around ever since; and sometimes there is a voice in my head that seems to be saying something worth listening to because it is saying something intriguing…

After I returned from Paris,  our doctor told my partner he needed to stop drinking for health reasons. So he did.

Well, I thought, if he was going to quit, then so was I.

Of course, I wanted to be supportive.

“Oh, hon–I am so proud of the way you’re not drinking. Would you be a pal and pass the vodka and cocktail shaker please?”

That just seemed counter-productive to me.

So, just before my birthday, I drank up all of the Jim Beam in the house–my partner had already quit drinking, so I was just being considerate and helpful, as per my nature.

No, we were not going to pour perfectly good bourbon down the sink! We could have given it away, but the last time I tried to give a bottle of liquor as a donation to Good Will they just pitched a fit, so really, what choice did I have?

One problem with stream of consciousness writing is the steam meanders a bit. Sometimes it forks off into a whole other direction.

“Brandy, you’re a fine girl…what a good wife you would be…but my life, my lover, my lady, is the sea…”

That damn song. It keeps coming up but I am determined to banish it. Moving on…

I mentioned in my potty mouth birthday blog, that for some reason, I felt a certain fascination with the fact that I turned 54 years old, which means I am entering my 55th year on Earth.

That really feels like a big deal to me–the fact that I am making my 55th journey around the sun.

Not so much from a “look how old I am” perspective. It is more like I feel a need or a desire to make this particular trip an especially special orbit. I don’t just mean “do fun stuff”–not that I don’t want to have fun, but it is more about when I get to the end of this orbit, I want to be able to know I am a better person for having taken this particular the journey.

I don’t know what that means precisely, but I am going to be giving it some thought–and will no doubt blather about it in this blog, if you’re interested, stay tuned.

We’re all on this spaceship together, after all.

You know, it never bothered me back in the day (1972, I believe) but today I find myself pondering, quite deeply, why, at night, Brandy walks through a silent town and loves a man who’s not around. WTF? Brandy, girl–he told you he isn’t going to marry you. He went back to his wife, his lover, his lady–the sea.

I’m not saying he’s gay, but… you have to ask, did Brandy ever wonder why this man preferred to spend time in the middle of the ocean with a bunch of sailors instead of her?

Oh, I know he gave her that braided chain made of finest silver from the North of Spain. you know the one–it’s got that locket that bears the name of the man that Brandy loves.
Just cause he gave her a fine piece of jewelry  doesn’t mean he isn’t gay. The gays are known for their good taste in jewelry. Well, not me. Or my  partner–but a lot of other gays have real good taste in lockets and such.

Oh, enough of that damn song!

Trying to rechannel the stream…

You know what I think?

I think Brandy needs to haul butt out of that port on that western bay and find her a real man, a true man–someone who will love her more than he loves a giant body of salt water and excessive quality time with other men on a boat in the middle of nowhere.

Surely I can find something else to write about…

Oh–here’s something cool. It started to rain just as I was leaving work. I didn’t cycle to work today, I drove. This turned out to be a good thing, because of the rain, but also because there was the most perfect rainbow in front of me as I headed toward home. There I was, zipping along 95, trying to look at the rainbow and drive at the same time.

At least I wasn’t texting:

A rainbow! OMG! WTF! SMH! LOL!

Rainbows are decidedly low-tech, but well worth a look see. It was a perfect arch too.  I craned my neck trying to see if there was a pot of gold, but no dice. Still, the rainbow itself was beautiful. One of nature’s most perfect moments.

The only thing that could have improved the moment would have been if a unicorn had leapt across 95 while I was driving past.

That almost never happens, so it was really just too much to ask.  I’ll just be grateful for the rainbow and call it an evening.

Rainbows and unicorns seems as good a way to end a blog as any.

Besides, I need to go put on some music before “Brandy” makes me rethink this whole being sober thing…

Happy PM!

 

Happy Hour Blog: Chris Lee (and Jim Beam) edition

10 Feb

I opened this blog with a series of Morning Pages. Then I took a break. There was rioting in Egypt.

Not that there’s any connection between these events…

Back when I was putting up blogs on the MySpace, I used to do these evening blogs (sort of counterpoint to the Morning Pages) I called Happy Hour blogs.

In both instances, I just detained fleeting insights and random thoughts and slapped them into the space provided and called it a blog. The difference being, in the AM I am hopped up on coffee and in the PM I am hopped up on…something else.

Happy Thursday! *Cheers* (Jim Beam, please…)

I don’t know about the rest of you, but my Wednesday (and into my Thursday morning) was consumed by news of Congressman Christopher Lee.

Did you hear about this?

First–let’s just clarify.  When I first heard that Rep. Christopher Lee was involved in a sex scandal I was all, “The star of Dracula Has Risen From The Grave, Airport 77 and Lord of the Rings is a Congressman?!”

Well, it turns out that more than one person can have the same name at the same time.

Who knew? (Another round, please…)

This Congress person guy is in no way related to the actor, Christopher Lee. Instead, he is was a Congressman from Buffalo, NY.

It seems that a woman in Washington, DC (one of my favorite towns!) posted an ad on Craig’s List (one of my favorite websites) in the Women for Men personals. Her ad asked for someone to prove to her that not all men who post on Craig’s List are “toads.”  For some random reason, Christopher Lee–the Congressman, not the world-famous actor, decided to respond to this ad. Not only did he send an email, he sent a picture of himself.

Shirtless.

Posing in front of a bathroom mirror.

Self-photographed with his Blackberry.

How MySpace throw-back is that?!

I don’t know about you, but I need a moment just to savor this… (another Jim Beam on the rocks, please!)

So…Rep. Lee, wrote this gal and said: “I hope I’m not a toad.”–then he inserted one of those keyboard created smiley face things that I refuse to reprint here.

The next thing Christopher Lee, Congressman from New York (and NOT the star of The Man with The Golden Gun, The Private Life of Sherlock Holmes or Sleepy Hollow ) said in his email is: “I am a fit, fun, classy guy.” (Except he didn’t bother with the commas. Apparently “fit” and “fun” “classy guys” can’t be wasting their time on actual, you know–punctuation.)

I think I need another drink…

“Here is the best part. You have a head start. If you are among the very young at heart…”

Actually, that last line was a song lyric. But our stalwart Congressman is apparently “among the very young at heart” (as it were), ’cause the next bit of info he conveyed to this anonymous lady (he seems determined to woo) is, “Live in Cap Hill area. 6ft 190lbs blond/blue. 39.. Lobbyist. I promise not to disappoint.”

This is kind of a poignant moment for me. Being all gnarly and middle-aged and all… Imagine. The need…the desire…the very thought process that says, “lie about your age. make yourself seem young. say you’re….39…”

Who pretends to be 39? Once you’ve passed 39, it is time to stop pretending, but…

Christopher Lee is 46.

Oh, who am I to judge. I haven’t dated in (mmmm, carry the 9…) 32 years. What do I know about dating protocols?! BUT WAIT…there’s more…

Isn’t there always more when it comes to a sex scandal?!

After an email exchange or two (oh, Internet, you make it so easy to woo…and to lie…Is there any difference?!) our pal, Chris (and surely by now we may call him Chris) tells his potential new friend that he is “divorced.”

Christopher Lee is married. 1 child. (To his credit, he did mention the one child in his “I am divorced” email. Not sure what the actual wife thinks about this. Waiting for her to write a book…)

Unfortunately for Mr. Lee, his online lady friend Googled his name, checked his email address against Facebook and lo and behold, she (like a long in the tooth Nancy Drew) discovers that Christopher Lee is NOT 39 years old, NOT divorced and NOT a lobbyist but a real life genuine CONGRESSMAN!

“Hell hath no fury”…and all that. “Ms. Craig’s List Ad” decided to send the emails and the shirtless picture to Gawker, an Internet website who was happy to report it online post haste.

Oops.

Congressman Lee’s office was swift to respond. With some lame story about his email account being hacked…

That lasted about 10 minutes.

“Next thing you know, old Jed’s a millionaire. Kinfolks said, you gotta move away from there…”

There may have been a momentary digression…one moment…”Jim Beam, you behave! You hear?!”

Alas, Congressman Lee abruptly resigned. After only a few hours of scorn and embarrassment.

What a buzzkill. A one day scandal?!

This is America! We expect so much more from our elected leaders.

It should be noted that Christopher Lee is a Republican.  Usually the guys from that side of the aisle are involved in scandals involving boys, prostitutes or airport glory holes so, in the pantheon of Family Values Hypocrites, Mr. Lee is a rank amateur.

For myself, I must note that former Congressman Lee voted against the repeal of Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell. Frankly, a man who is so interested in the particulars of the sex lives of others should expect this kind of karma.

I have heard it is very cold in Buffalo. I bet it is chillier than ever for the former Congressman Christopher Lee.

He might want to invest in a nice bottle of Jim Beam…

Happy Thursday evening, everyone.

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